How many times have you said something in the past and the words come back into your mind to literally haunt you? I mean every letter and every vowel of each word – replaying over and over inside your head. It is such a grievous feeling of condemnation that it affects you in every possible way. There are many times through these life challenges that I have cried and wept. What is the difference between crying and weeping? I really do not know the politically correct answer. I can only say, for me crying is a reaction to an emotion. Weeping, for me, is the gut wrenching, down-to-the-cord-of-the-pain anguish. Weeping is when you do not know what to do; you have absolutely no control over the circumstances of what is about to occur in that moment. It is as if you are in an action movie…but everything is in slow motion. You’re there…slowly taking in the drama – the hurt – the pain – the suffering – taking it all in and you have no control to stop it – none whatsoever.
As a minister, I have a covenant with God. My covenant responsibilities are to take care of God’s sheep. One responsibility is to provide the spiritual and moral tools to help anyone make good decisions that will not spiritually hinder him or her. Spiritually and morally, I am accountable to each person that I encounter. In addition, I am prophet, so I cannot mess us – oh the pressure! I will be in jeopardy of losing my soul to hell if I do not honor my covenant as a minister and prophet. This is why I do not take my “calling” as a joke nor do I operate in my flesh when I prophesized.
As I was walking home one day, I noticed a couple ahead of me. Every few minutes they stopped to smooch and whisper to each other. All of sudden their gentle touches became violent. They began yelling at each other in the middle of the street. I was tripping on this couple because the words they yelled made me wonder why they were together in the first place. Neither of them displayed the ingredients for a normal, healthy relationship. They weren’t even aware of how ignorant and disrespectful they were being. Well the conversation ended when the “gentleman” yelled “You suck my d!#k!” Not one for backing down, the “young lady” replied, “Well you eat my pu$#y!”
This is not the first time I’ve witnessed “loving couples,” married and unmarried go at it in public. I have been at small friendship gatherings, birthday parties, and at family reunions where this disrespect has become the new norm between couples. They would argue, belittle, curse at one another and bring out personal failures while everyone in attendance looked on. Not only is this disrespectful, but it could also lead to domestic violence. Then these “loving couples” have the nerve to tell those in the room to stay out of their business. Well, if they didn’t want folks commenting or gossiping about their business, they should argue at home.
I received this post in an email and found it very inspirational. When things are not going the way you want, just turn it all over to God:
This is _______________. Thank you God for blessing me to see another day. God, I come before you this morning with feelings that have begun to consume me. Lately, I’ve felt overwhelmed. I feel sad. I am confused. I’m feeling angry. I’ve become bitter. I feel discouraged. I feel hurt. I feel abandoned. I feel taken for granted. I feel unloved. My soul is weary. As these feelings deepen within me, I am beginning to feel lost. Who am I? I don’t recognize me! I have tried to figure it out on my own, and I receive what I now know, is only a temporary fix, because these feelings always resurface. This place is not where I desire to be Lord, so this morning, “oh my Lord, my precious Lord………………. I SURRENDER:
I surrender my husband/wife and trust you to restore what has been lost. We are slowly becoming strangers. I feel alienated. The ability to talk with each other has become strained. The love we once basked in seems like a distant memory. Bless my marriage dear God, that it be restored to what you would have it to be.
I surrender my relationship that has entered troubled waters. It seems like there is trouble throughout this relationship that I’ve invested so much into. Bless me Lord that I trust you to do what you desire to do. If this relationship is for me, I trust you to restore it better than it was. If it is not for me, I trust you to remove me from it and give me what I need to press forward.
I surrender my child(ren) and trust you to give me discernment in all areas of their lives, as well as the wisdom to guide them accordingly.
I surrender my finances and trust you to provide where there is lack.
Have you ever been in a situation where everything was going great, and then out of nowhere, you get thrown a curveball? Work going well, relationship wonderful, and house in order…then BOOM…your boss writes you up for what feels like nothing, your significant other walks out and your house needs more repairs in one week than it needed in 1 year. Instead of screaming, “Lord, why me?! What did I do wrong?” think, “Lord what are You trying to tell me?” Sometimes God uses these difficult situations to shake us out of our complacency. Maybe you know the relationship you’re in isn’t the healthiest, but you don’t know how to leave; or you feel the urge to move from your current location but are scared because of the economy. You could even be like me: feeling stuck and praying for a breakthrough only to get frustrated when it happens. Let me step back a bit to help you understand…