We are proud to introduce the new “Change My Behavior” online store.  The proceeds of the store go to fund our programs.  Though there are administrative costs involved, we do not charge those we serve.  Instead, we rely on small private donations and store sales.  We do not want to reject anyone who needs our help, but we need your support. We’re asking that you purchase a t-shirt for yourself, a family member, your organization or a friend.  In the coming month, we will start introducing books and other products that will help you overcome negative behavior.

Though we are a 501(c)3 non-profit, we are lead by God.  Though funds are needed, we ask that you petition the Lord before you decide to purchase a product or make a donation to our organization.  Remember, it is not just money but a financial seed.  If God spoke to your heart to sow a financial seed into our organization, in obedience, please do. We do not want you to miss any opportunities that God has for you. Only God can and will meet every need and ever desire according to His will and purpose for your life and your love ones too.

In addition, God loves a cheerful giver! God’s promise is that He will bless those who give cheerfully. As you sow a sacrificial seed into our programs, make a joyful noise unto God. Begin to praise God with a loud voice. Give God thanks for meeting every need and desire of your heart by standing on His promises, “for God calls those things to be as though they are.”  Remember what we taught you. Let God’s “will be done in the earth as IT IS IN HEAVEN.”  What God has for you is ALREADY.  PRAISE GOD!

PLEASE PURCHASE ANY T-SHIRT BELOW FOR A DONATION OF JUST $20.00. We are adding new unique handcrafts and other products to our store as we grow. I will also have my book “God, I Want to Sin!” posted soon for you to download.

White Cotton T-Shirts

Heather Grey Cotton T-Shirts

All of our products are to encourage you as you grow and learn to change your behavior for the better. Shipping is free, and we are a 501(c) 3 organization, so you can receive a tax credit.

IF YOU HAVE ANY IDEAS OR SUGGESTIONS, PLEASE EMAIL ME.

PLEASE CONTINUE TO EMAIL YOUR PRAYER REQUESTS. WE ARE IN PRAYER FOR YOU.

WE WILL ALWAYS BE GRATEFUL FOR ANY SUPPORT THAT YOU SOW INTO OUR ORGANIZATION!

THANK YOU!

These are basic samples for you to choose. ALL T-SHIRTS PRINTED PROFESSIONALLY.

You were “predestinated” in the spiritual realm. God is a Spirit. God wanted to glorify Himself through the physical realm. Therefore, God produce a physical realm from the spiritual realm. The physical realm became the stratosphere known as the universe, consisting of multiple physical planets. One of the multiple physical planets is name earth.  God prepares the earth for all creation.  Once all creations made, the earth became the world.

God made the final creation in is His image, which is the spiritual form made physical form of a human body. The human body has a soul. The soul (nephesh in Hebrew) means life or possessing life. The soul gives life to the human body. The human body needs a mind, for the mind activates and controls the human body.  A physical force activates the mind to generate the mind, and the mind once generated, activates the human body. The mind is the nucleus, control center, for the human body.  The human body can only function by receiving signals from the mind. Mind, body, and soul comprise a human body.

God is faith. God gives unto everyone a “measure of Faith.” The measure of Faith is God himself. God himself cannot produce within you until activation of the measure of Faith. The activation comes by the “PREACHING OF THE GOSPEL” heard.  The Gospel is the Word, Jesus Christ, our Lord and Savior, sacrificed.  Otherwise, the Gospel became after the death and resurrection of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. The preaching of the Gospel accomplished through a preacher, minister (servant and or Believer), evangelist, and or teacher. (All should be anointed and operate spiritual gifts by and through the Holy Spirit.)

The Preaching of the Gospel heard is the seed, which is Jesus Christ, our Lord and Savior. When one hear and accept the preaching of the Gospel heard, planted is that seed.  In order for the seed to grow, the seed must receive water. The “water” is the MEASURE OF FAITH.  Once the seed is watered, then one accepts Jesus Christ as Lord and Savior reconciling each of us back to God. God receives the increase, which is God’s glory.

God then takes the seed (the preaching of the Gospel heard) and the water (measure of faith) producing Himself within each of us. Now, God being faith activates faith.  God responding to God as Faith is to Faith. Having faith means trusting that every word God spoke is true. Therefore, God responds to His word.  This is why it is so important that one hear, study, and pray God’s word.

Many Christians only listens to a preacher during a worship service. Most do not carry a Holy Bible to their place of worship. Many Christians live defeated lives because he or she does not know the spoken promises of God. They do not spend time learning the Word of God, neither do they pray until something bad happens. Many Christians live defeated because of their unwillingness to become discipline by and through the Holy Spirit, which is the third entity of God. The “Holy Spirit is our Comforter and teacher.” Many Christians rely on others within their Christian doctrines and not God by and through the Holy Spirit.

God glorifies himself each time a human being hears and accepts the preaching of the Gospel. Remember God gave man free will to choose either salvation, which is eternal life or eternal spiritual damnation. When you choose salvation, then you activate the God within you.  Therefore, you are no longer a “slave” to sin (bad and immoral behaviors), and you receive the power of God through faith to become an Over Comer.

An Over Comer is a person who has received victory over trials and tribulations and by the word of their testimony. Trials and tribulations are producing you to grow in faith trusting in God (faith). Some Christians read and study the Holy Bible, and that is all good.  However, one must EXPERIENCE faith, which is God as the Word produce.  The Word produce increases within you with each trial and tribulation you pass.

You can only pass each trial and tribulation by applying what you have heard, read, and study, which is the only way one truly knows, by experiencing the Word of God by what you have heard, read, and study.  Trials and Tribulations are experiences of growth in God’s Word. The Word is our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ.

As you experience growth through the trials and tribulations, you are becoming discipline not to allow sin (bad and immoral behaviors) to rule over your life. Thus, you are increasing in “faith producing righteousness.” Therefore, you become the “righteousness of God.” As you increase in faith, you become more dependent upon God and not yourself, thus developing your relationship through righteousness toward God. The more your faith increases, the stronger you become. You have a testimony.

There are some trials and tribulations of “REAPING WHAT YOU HAVE SOWED,” “for whom God has chosen, he also chastens, for God chastens whom he loves” as father is to child. Some trials and tribulations will expose those “ugly” things within you. Yep. You will begin to see why you needed salvation, and you will no longer take your salvation for granted. There are some trials and tribulations that birth the bury gifts and talents you have within you. These types of trials and tribulations activate those gifts and talents to be push out of you, thus, forcing you to use those gifts and pushing you out of your comfort zone.

All of these trials and tribulations experiences will produce the “fruit of the spirit” while accomplishing the will and purpose of God within your life. You will begin to seek God’s will and not your own will.  What is really cool is that all trials and tribulations are “And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to his purpose.” Yep. Your love for God increases too. As your love increases for God, so does the love for your neighbor. You should no longer desire just do you for you.

God is the “author and finisher” of your life. God has written the script for your life. You are the sole “actor” of your script of life. Join, as the physical “Body of Christ”, is you and other “actors” who have received Salvation. Each “actor” must overcome trials and tribulations, so, you, the actor, then become an instrument for God to use, as the “church” in the earth, to have the “will of God to be done in the earth as it is in heaven.” 

Meanwhile, God is preparing the “church” (you) as a bride. The “church” is the “physical body” of predestine overcomers from the spiritual realm.  The “church,” the physical Body of Christ is joined together (married) with the spiritual Body of Christ. Thus, the church (you) and the Holy Trinity are joined together to reign eternal on the “new earth.”

My sister and my brother in Christ Jesus, we must activate our faith in order to grow in faith. Therefore, do not worry in fear of the trials and tribulations one endures.  “No weapon that formed against YOU will prosper; and every tongue that shall rise against YOU in judgment YOU condemn. This is the heritage of the servants of the LORD, and their righteousness is of me, says the LORD.”

You must adjust your attitude by changing the way YOU think by “renewing your mind” (The control center of your body.). You must view your trials and tribulations as lessons to increase your faith in God, which faith is God. With every trial and every tribulation, you must ask God what He is teaching you and then learn the lesson, so you can increase (graduate) to the next level.

The next level of faith increase is the next level in God drawing you closer to Him. Therefore, the more you trust God to take care of you and others.

You cannot go to the next level until you pass the trial or tribulation.  If you do not learn the lesson taught by the trial or tribulation, you will repeat the trial and tribulation until you learn and pass.

Each one who grows in faith receives greater rewards besides receiving victory over each trial and tribulation. The greater rewards is written; “eye has not seen, nor ear heard, neither have entered into the heart of man, the things which God has prepared for them that love him.” 

“Blessed Be God!”

Most say that we are too fussy or too literal when we speak certain terms. Many will say, “Stop being so serious will ya!”  Sorry to tell you, we must be serious when it comes to the words we speak.  I have repeatedly written articles on the usage of terms that we speak. WORDS HAVE MEANING IN ITS TRUE FORM. Words or terms have power.

The old “stick and stones may break my bones and words will never hurt me” is a lie!  Words or terms have life.  Words or terms emotionally hurt and many are walking around crippled by what someone spoke into their lives.  In fact, words and terms have killed or murdered many. For, it would be nice, if most of us would just go to the Encyclopedia of Life, the Word of God – the Holy Bible, and study, then we will learn when to speak and when not to speak.  Many will learn to use wisdom in our terms.  Many will learn the authority of what God has given to each of us just by standing on God’s terms.

I know many of you have seen the commercial that is telling us to stop using the word “gay.”  The word or term GAY is offensive to those who practice homosexuality.  Then if using the word gay is offensive to a particular group of people, then bitch, whore, and other true racial or other negative terms used to display a group of people should be offensive too. Where are those commercials?

I do not see any commercials telling us to stop using the term nigger or bitch that are offensive to other groups of people.   I know that bitch or nigger is very offensive to me as a woman and as being African American.  I hate terms that depict any group of people – period!

Using God’s name in vain is a popular term – today’s “cool” urban term.  I really hate it, and I do mean hate it, when most use God’s name in vain. You know and I hope you do not do it too, the term “Oh My God,” Some try to say “Oh my gawd.” What does “Gawd” mean anyway? I mean really, I want to know. According to Urban Dictionary, Gawd is “a way of writing “Oh my God” while denoting that you’re rolling your eyes at the same time.”

Yeah, many try to clean it up by using the term “gawd” but we know what it really means, and it is offensive. For me, those who use the popular “oh my God or “gawd” are disrespecting my Heavenly Father.  Most get downright ugly, and I do mean, they are ready to fight right down to the nitty-gritty when someone is talking badly against their Mom or Dad or even sister or brother. This is how I feel when people use my Heavenly Father’s name in vain.  I am ready to be King David with my sling shot in hand.

In addition to using God’s name in vain, many use terms that reverence God in vain too.  Such terms of reverence as “Holy” are to reverence and worship our Heavenly father. Most will tell you that terms such as “holy cow” are only expressions and mean absolutely nothing, and God will forgive when one takes his name and holy expressions in vain.

Holy means sanctify – to be set apart. The term Holy is God’s moral and ethical perfection for a freedom from moral evil.  Holy means Holiness, which is one of the essential elements of our God; it is to glorify God in the worship of God.  Holy is consecrated and reserve from disrespect of common use. Holy is devoted to the service of God.

As the “Righteousness” of God (Christians) made holy, we are spiritually whole through our salvation. The Holiness of God is perfect and made free from sinful affection by and through the Holy Spirit. We are to have a pure heart that is acceptable to God.  The Righteousness of God is not “perfect” by our self.  We are “perfect” only by and through the holiness Blood of Jesus Christ, our Lord and Savior.

These expressions are “only” to worship and exalt God, our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. Hosea 4:6, said “My people are destroyed for lack of knowledge: because one has rejected knowledge.”

Those of us whom are the called and chosen of God are serious when we write or speak to lives. We are accountable to God for each soul that either read or listen to what we speak.

I, like many others, spend time praying, fasting, studying, and thoroughly “dividing the word of truth.”  “Study to show thyself approved unto God, a workman that need not to be ashamed, rightly dividing the word of truth” (2^nd Timothy 2:15). Jeremiah 3:5 said “And I will give you pastors according to mine heart, which shall feed you with knowledge and understanding.”

It is extremely important that the Righteousness of God (Christians) deem holy do not take words and terms meant to worship and glorify God in vain.

Now, I want you to picture yourself in a place of worship or out in a place of peace. Sincerely begin to worship God, your Heavenly Father, by saying or singing “Holy, Holy, Holy, Lord God Almighty” repeatedly. Wait and see, if you are doing it sincerely, how you will feel the presence of a Holy God. Wait in silence and see how God will bless you.

Now, how can one take what is so holy a term and then speak “holy cow or any negative holy,” and you tell me, what is up with that? How can a cow become holy anyway?  When did a cow need sanctification? When then anything else, other than you and I, need sanctification.

Check this:

“Thou shalt not take the name of the LORD thy God in vain; for the LORD will not hold him guiltless, that takes his name in vain” (Exodus 20:7)

“Remember the Sabbath day, to keep it holy” (Exodus 20:8)

“And thou shalt hang up the veil under the taches, that thou may bring in thither within the veil the ark of the testimony: and the veil shall divide unto you between the holy place and the most holy; And thou shalt put the mercy seat upon the ark of the testimony in the most holy place” (Exodus 26:33-34)

“Let them praise thy great and terrible name; for it is holy” (Exodus 99:3)

“Exalt you the LORD our God, and worship at his footstool; for he is holy” (Exodus 99:5)

“For He that is mighty hath done to me great things; and holy is His name” (St. Luke 1:49)

“For the Holy Ghost shall teach you in the same hour what you ought to say” (St. Luke 12:12)

“I beseech you therefore, brethren, by the mercies of God, that you present your bodies a living sacrifice, holy, acceptable unto God, which is your reasonable service” (Romans 12:1)

“In the body of his flesh through death, to present you holy and unblameable and unreproveable in his sight” (Colossians 1:22)

Do you understand me now?

Those who take the worship term of “Holy” in vain are taking God’s honor and glory from Him. Yes, I will write it again. Those who use the term “holy” so loosely, are taking away the honor and glory of the God, we say we love.

More importantly, those who speak God’s name in vain and use the terms to glorify Him, do not respect God.

“For God hath not called us unto uncleanness, but unto holiness; He therefore that despises, despises not man, but God, who hath also given unto us his Holy Spirit” (1^st Thessalonians 4:7-8)

So you tell me, why should our God answer the prayers of those who play Him so cheaply and not respect Him?

Please God, please tell me why, God Why?

How many times have you heard one ask “why does not God do something about all the bad in the world, or “it was that person’s time to die, or that person was in the wrong place at the wrong time, or why did God take my baby or love one from me.”

Although the emotions are real, most have said these types of comments out of ignorance to the knowledge of the Word of God and their lack of faith in a Holy and Righteous God. Moreover, one does not stop to think that their lifestyle may be the cause to such tragedies within their lives.  This is not in all cases of tragedy, but it is for many who do not lived their lives in obedience to God.

I am not speaking against the missionaries and others who are doing the will of God, so do not get what I am writing twisted.  We know the dangers of evil. Many of Jesus disciples died doing the will of God.  I am speaking of those who are disobedient to God and question why bad things are happening to him or her.  God tells us to “consider our ways” (Haggai: 1:7). One should consider their ways before blaming God and others.

God always warns the righteous before an event occurs, so the righteous can escape.  However, if the righteous does not adhere to the warning, then it is out of their own disobedience that he or she has met their fate.

People, in our finite thinking, are always trying to make sense of something that cannot be explained or when tragedy occurs. Furthermore, a person cannot expect God to fight his or hers battles: sickness, poverty and the other life challenges or the bad things happening, if the person lives a raggedy Christian life.

Those who are obedient to God and walk in love are God’s righteous sake. It is not enough for one to simply believe and join a church. The “act” of itself does not make one righteous with God. After a person repents and receives salvation by his or her own confession of faith in God, that person is no longer under the “law or curse.”

The person is made righteous through the blood of Jesus Christ our Lord and Savior.  However, one should come into the knowledge of God. It is not enough to be a “good” person doing “good” things. One must be the righteous of God meaning right standing with God by walking with God and abiding in God’s word.

There is not one scripture stating that a person cannot lose their salvation if one is not in right standing with God abiding in God’s word. Yes. The person is saved by the grace of God, but God commands that we love Him completely and that we love our neighbors. If one does not love God completely by abiding in his word, and if one does not love their neighbor, then they are not the righteousness of God.

For those who are of the righteousness of God, God has promise: “In righteousness will you be established: you will be far from oppression; for you will not fear: and from terror; for it shall not come near you. Behold, they shall surely gather together, but not by me: whosoever shall gather together against you will fall for your sake.” (Isaiah 54:14-15).  This is just one of the promises that God has for his righteous sake.

My favorite part of the entire verse is “Behold, they shall surely gather together, but not by me.”  Otherwise, evil will come but NOT by God.  Another promise is that “No weapon that is formed against you will prosper; and every tongue that will rise against you in judgment YOU condemn. This is the heritage of the servants of the LORD, and their righteousness is of me, says the LORD.” (Isaiah 54:17).

You see, God did not say that bad things were not going to be formed, otherwise appear, to be against you.  The key word is formed which can mean appear.  God said that the results from the bad things that appear would not prosper. Therefore, one already has the victory of knowing that whatever appears will not destroy you, so one should never fear, but stand on God’s promises. However, if you lived a raggedy Christian life, than how can God’s word work in your life or the life of your love ones?

You can only stand on the promises of God when you are doing your part by loving God with all of your heart, your soul, and your mind, and loving your neighbor as you do yourself.  Your desire should be that every time God looks at you, God smiles. To love God means to abide in God’s word. God says that those that love me – abide in me, are those who are mines. “If you abide in me, and my words abide in you, you shall ask what you will, and it shall be done unto you” (St. John 15:7). This is another promise of God.

As I have shared before that, I do not believe in “common sense.”  What makes “common sense” to you may not make “common sense” to me and what make “common sense” to me may not make “common sense” to you. The “common sense” determines are lives conditioning.  Therefore, if I say that God told me not to do something, one may not understand or it will not make “common sense” to that person, or if I say “I am going to pray about it.” Most people look at you very strangely, although he or she may be a Christian.

Furthermore, we do not always know the starting point of a tragedy or tragedy of events. We cannot say this or that about any – thing; we just do not know.  And, those who think that they know the answers to the unexplained are arrogant to say the very least.

God says, “For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways, said the LORD. For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways, and my thoughts than your thoughts. For as the rain cometh down, and the snow from heaven, and returned not thither, but watered the earth, and makes it bring forth and bud, that it may give seed to the sower, and bread to the eater: So shall my word be that goes forth out of my mouth: it shall not return unto me void, but it shall accomplish that which I please, and it shall prosper in the thing whereto I sent it”. (Isaiah 55:8-11)

Anyone can justify their opinion or may be able to prove that “there is no God” because of the horrible things and tragic events that occur in the world, which we lived. However, we – all of us, must take responsibility for our actions to why the world is what it is in the physical.

Many tragic events occur because of just plain-ole sin. Sometimes, tragic deaths occur to the sin that most practice in their lives, unforgiveness of others, generational curses, worshipping idol gods and worshipping others, worshipping money and material things, or not loving and caring for others as we should, or mistreating and using others – just plain ole disobedience – period!

As I have stated before, most Christian’s are just religious. I have said that we must stop being religious.  Either one is going to be obedient to his or hers Salvation or not.  Either one will have faith in the only Holy Living God through our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ or not.

Most Christian believers say they believe in a God and that Jesus Christ died for our sins. That is good, so does the demons, for St. James 2:19 tells us that “Thou believe that there is one God; thou do well: the devils also believe, and tremble.” To me, it is to say, so what that you believe, what does your life speak and what does your words speak?

One’s salvation and faith in our God cannot be, “yeah, it is okay to believe, but one must be realistic.”  What is that?”  We are not in the twilight zone.

Repeatedly, I have heard these types of comments among Christian believers.  When Christian believers make these types of comments, neither he nor she really believes that God’s word is true or that God really exists. Again, these Christians are making God to be only a religion. Otherwise, God is a convenient. Therefore, when one says, “one must be realistic” or “God’s willed for that person to die or to be sick.” It is with their own words, they have defeated their victory in faith in the will of God, which is God’s Holy word.

Most of these ignorant comments made by Christians are because he or she does not know their God. Therefore, most do not know the will of God.  It is because he or she does not spend the time to study and pray God’s word.  It is because he or she refuses to become discipline. To become righteous, one must become discipline that means, one must give up some old habits and some folks.

I mean how many times does God have to give a Christian believer, what I called a “Holy Ghost Whipping” before one get a clue.  How many times does one have to “go-through” the same or similar situations repeatedly before one learns, so one can mature and go on to the next level in their life.

Christian believers must seek God’s righteousness.  Christians must study the Word of God – the Holy Bible and walk in God’s righteousness. It is not about being religious.  It is not about quoting scriptures or toting a Holy Bible for all to see.  It is one’s life style.  It is you not being religious but having a genuine personal relationship with the God, Lord and Savior, that you said, you love.

It is not about the things that you do not, but it is about the things you do for the right reasons. Does God receive the glory each time you do the things you do? Are you doing the things you do to seek rewards or praise from others? Do you think that you are all of that just because you do not do certain sins like those other so-called Christian folks – those church people?

Just because one said, “Jesus” or “praise the Lord or,” the popular, “giving honor to God who is the head of my life,” does not mean that neither he nor she really loves the Lord our God. It is just lip service. God said; “So then because thou art lukewarm, and neither cold nor hot, will I spew thee out of my mouth.” (Revelations: 3:16), and “This people honors me with their lips, but their heart is far from me.” (St. Mark 7:6)

Yes, you will sin, but you should not practice sin. The practice of sexual sins, worshipping other idol gods and people, selfishness, greed, unforgiveness, mistreatment of others, and other sins are abominations that Christians, not unbelievers, but Christians are doing to God that constitutes sin in the land. Therefore, there is sin in the land.

God’s solution:

“If my people, which are called by my name, shall humble themselves, and pray, and seek my face, and turn from their wicked ways; then will I hear from heaven, and will forgive their sin, and will heal their land” (2^nd Chronicles 7:14)

Furthermore, God has so many promises for those who walk upright before him: “For the LORD God is a sun and shield: the LORD will give grace and glory: no good thing will he withhold from them that walk uprightly “(Psalms 84:11).

“In that I command thee this day to love the LORD your God, to walk in his ways, and to keep his commandments and his statutes and his judgments, that YOU will live and multiply: and the LORD your God shall bless you.” (Deuteronomy 30:16 – read the full chapter)

I know that many people question and think that God has allowed all the bad things to happen. I know that many people feel that it is better not to question God to why bad things do happen (again being religious).

The Holy Spirit gave me instructions to help those who seek counseling, and they have worked repeatedly, so follow the steps below:

First, I asked him or her do they believe in God.

I asked them do they believe that Jesus Christ died for their sins, and what does it mean to them. 

Then, I tell them that I want them to go to God first before I counsel them.

I tell them to go to a place where it is just them and God.

I tell them to get ugly-humble before God and repent. I mean scream, cry – snot, boogers and all to get it all out – come completely clean.

I tell them to tell God all that you feel and all that you have done.

I tell them to tell God of your fears and your sins.

I tell them to tell God that you are too weak to fight these sinful challenges on your own and you need HELP!  Tell God! 

Why do I tell people who are seeking counseling to go to God first?

Simple, I do not have the answers to his or hers problems, but God does.

That person must go to back to the Creator – God first.

In doing so, God has promise that the Holy Spirit will reveal the truth to him or her: “Howbeit when he, the Spirit of truth, is come, he will guide you into all truth: for he shall not speak of himself; but whatsoever he shall hear, that shall he speak: and he will show you things to come.” (St. John 16:13)

Those who I have counseled, I rarely hear from again after three counseled sessions. God is now in complete control over his or hers life.  Many have continued to walk in obedience for the love of God, and they have prospered in the areas of their lives. Ever now or then, my sisters, brothers, sons or daughters (I do not called them clients) will call me for a little guidance, and that is okay with me.

You see, I am writing to you for what I know works, for I have gone through many of life challenges.  The greatest have been sickness and near death experiences of more than one occasion. I had to learn to trust God no matter what appears to be.  I had to look pass my finite thinking and learn to trust God and what God has said in his Word.

It feels so good to get the victory over sickness and other areas in the lives of my family and me.  It feels good that I can live daily not worrying about bills, food, or shelter.  It is so assuring knowing that God will answer my prayers.

More importantly, I know that my love ones and I have God’s protection. God lets me know each time that I am His, and that makes me want more of God and to do more for God, for God is truly faithful.

My assurance is that I can come boldly to the thrown of Grace, because I know that I walk upright before God. Therefore, God has to do what He said that He would do for my love ones and for me (my house).  In confidence, I could not come to the thrown of Grace if I lived my life in disobedience to God. Because, I live my life in obedience, God must keep his promises. God will not fail himself.  Therefore, God will not fail his promises, for God is the Word.

Blessed Be God!

Righteousness works!  I tell ya, righteousness does work!

Go to God for yourself. God will answer your questions of why this or that has happen in your life. God will answer your questions concerning your love ones.  However, you must be honest with yourself and with God. Once one start to walk in righteousness, things will change for the better, and you will know how to trust God in the times of trouble.  You will have peace.

God is waiting to hear from you.

Today, many Christian leaders of certain Christian denominations are teaching that there is no longer a need to pray the Lord’s Prayer.

In the Holy Bible God has not said that a person should only pray the Lord’s Prayer for a short time, and He will give you something else.

God did not say it, so Do Not Do It!

You should always pray the Lord’s Prayer before making your personal declaration of prayer because the Lord’s Prayer is POWERFUL itself!

The Lord’s Prayer is in the Gospels of the New Testament:

The first Book of the New Testament is the Gospel of Saint Matthews – Chapter 6 – Verses 9 through 13, and the third Book of the New Testament is the Gospel of Saint Luke – Chapter 11 – Verses 1 through 4.

“Our father which art in heaven, hollowed be thy name.  Thy kingdom come.  Thy will be done in earth as it is in heaven.  Give us this day our daily bread.  And forgive us our debts as we forgive our debtors (those who have sinned against us). And lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil: For thine is the kingdom, and the power, and the glory, forever. Amen”

Let me break-it-down-for-ya!

“Our Father which are in heaven”

Acknowledging God by his children in and of faith

“Hallowed be thy name”

“Hallowed” meaning Holy, set apart from sin, honoring God’s name

“Thy kingdom come”

The obedient servants (God’s righteous sake) takes the full-authority to rule the earth, fulfilling God’s Word (will and purpose), in bringing everything, that has already been established in heaven.

Our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ have already given us full authority; however, Satan still rules the earthy sphere. Many base their salvation by their Christian Doctrine and or church.

It is my opinion (my opinion) that ALL Christian doctrines are “doctrines of sin.” Okay you can get up off the floor, or pick up your mouth off the floor.

The reason why it is my opinion that ALL Christian doctrines are “doctrines of sin” is because each doctrine was created in retaliation of someone else’s belief.  For example, Martin Luther did not agree with the Roman Catholic Church. Thus, we have the theology of Martin Lutheran Church and so on. Now, we have almost one million supposedly “Christian” doctrines – all taking God’s word and adding their own “salt and pepper” (theology) to it.”

The only doctrine should always be our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ – God’s Word – Himself. We are not to Add to God’s Word nor take anything from it.  We are to always to be directed by and through the Holy Spirit and not our flesh.

“Thy will be done in earth as it is in heaven”

This verse is so cool!

Check it out!

Everything is done in heaven and this is to include all of God’s promises, including the Gospel of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. For example, there is no sickness in heaven, so there should not be sickness on the earth.

Our duty, God’s Righteous, is to do the will of God as it is in heaven. The Righteous of God is on one accord -praying and operating in faith according to God’s will – meaning God’s Word. EVERYTHING that has already been done in heaven IS done on earth.

Now, The Righteous is those of us who are obedient to God – not religious.  How do you know if you are righteous?

#1.       God says that you will know his righteous (his people) by their love

#2.       God says that you will know his righteous (his people) by their fruit

#3.       God says that you will know his righteous (his people) by their anointing.

#4.       God says that you will know his righteous (his people) by their confession

The Gospel is to be preached (St. Matthews 28:18-19) and every word God spoke and thing God created from beginning to end is to be done according to God’s perfect will.

The other exciting thing about this verse is that God has already blessed you with everything you need and or desire according to his will. When you are praying God’s will for your life and others, and as you walk in obedience, those things already done for you in heaven is done for you on earth. At God’s appointed time, God’s word for your life will come to pass.

This is why YOU can stand on God’s promise; “But as it is written, Eye have not seen, nor ear heard, neither have entered into the heart of man, the things which God hath prepared for them that love him.” (1^st Corinthians 2:9) PRAISE GOD!

Remember that God created YOU for his glory. “Even every one that is called by my name: for I have created him for my glory, I have formed him; yea, I have made him.” (Isaiah 43:7)

God knows what you will do and what you will not do. It is up to YOU to ask God for his will for YOUR life each day and that YOU have granted God’s permission to “order YOUR steps” to do his will and not to seek your own will.

“The steps of a good man are ordered by the LORD: and he delights in his way.” (Psalms 37:23)

Remember God is not going to go against your will. However, as a warning, each of us may reap negative consequences when we seek our own will.

Knowing that God is ordering your steps according to his will should provide to you inner peace, joy, and assurance that “all things are working together for your good to those who love the lord and are called for his purpose.” (Romans 8:28)

Now, let us continue…

“Give us this day our daily bread.”

When we pray this verse, we are requesting for God to provide EVERYTHING – spirit – mind – body that we need through our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ for this day.

We are asking our Heavenly father to provide ALL to include food, shelter, guidance, loving our neighbors, control over are behavior and meeting all of our need for this day.

“But my God shall supply all your need according to his riches in glory by Christ Jesus; now unto God and our Father be glory for ever and ever. Amen.” (Philippians 4:19-20)

“Forgive us of our debts as we forgive our debtors.”

Okay let me make this verse personal because it is personal.

The first thing is that you are asking our Heavenly Father to forgive you for your sins and your debts.

There are sins (offensives) and debts that we owed to others that we may not be aware of like when we speak or do offensive things to others, or our ugly attitudes, or when we are arrogant-thinking that we are better than someone else or smarter, or when we walk in pride or have a big ego, and when we are racist etc.

So squash the false teaching from those whom have said that you do not have to repent or ask for forgiveness from sins that you are not aware of.  This verse proves that that is not true.  You do have to repent for sins that you are not aware of. Otherwise, Jesus would have not taught us to pray this verse. God’s got everything covered (Blessed Be God!)

“As we forgive our debtors” This verse is only effective base upon your actions “as we.”  We are requesting God to forgive our sins and debts on the same level or actions “as” we do.  Otherwise, YOU are granting God to forgive YOU based upon the same level of how YOU forgive.

“Lead us not into temptation but deliver us from evil.”

When I was a babe, I had to ask the Holy Spirit about this verse. At first, I did not get the understanding in human form. I had gotten another “spiritual headache” – “another ooh!”

It is MY understanding that this verse is to help and protect us from the choices we make that are not God’s will and purpose. Otherwise, this verse protects us from when we seek the desires of our flesh.

For those of you who are struggling with the flesh, please read and meditate on the verses in chapter one of the book of St. James. Please remember that it is the Word of God that sustained and help you overcome temptation of the flesh with the power of the Holy Spirit…

“Let no man say when he is tempted, I am tempted of God: for God cannot be tempted with evil, neither tempted he any man: But every man is tempted, when he is drawn away of his own lust, and enticed. (St. James 1:13-14)

“There hath (is) no temptation taken you but such as is common to man: but God is faithful, who will not suffer you to be tempted above that you are able; but will with the temptation also make a way to escape, that you may be able to bear it.” (1^st Corinthians 10:13)

The “evil” comes from not seeking and doing God’s will for our life.”

“For when they speak great swelling words of vanity, they allure through the lusts of the flesh, through much wantonness, those that were clean escaped from them who live in error.” (2^nd Peter 2:18)

“Submit yourselves therefore to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you.” (St. James 4:7)

“For thine (it) is the kingdom”

God’s authority and will

“And the power”

And the power – God is the only powerful ruler of each of us and the entire earth including Satan and hell

“And the glory”

All honor and praise will always be given to our Heavenly Father.

“Forever”

Always

“Amen”

So it is spoken, so it is done.

I was known in the beginning,

Time at hand,

A power so strong,

There’s nothing wrong,

Dirt made me,

Power brought me into life,

Good from the Creator,

Good and Perfect I am,

Just Me,

Good you see,

Society wants something else in me,

Sorry, it wasn’t meant to be,

I was made to do great things,

It’s called God’s Glory

Just Me,

So stop trying to craft me,

Oh society!

I was already created to be,

To do what is best,

I was not meant to pass your test,

It was already declared,

From beginning to end

Already I win,

Just Me,

I am already to be,

Mind, Body, Spirit, and Soul,

Just Me,

A story to unfold,

A Victory in me,

For the World to see,

For it’s just me,

I do not know,

Who else to be,

Just Me.

Hello My Friend,

I will be focusing on suicide on a later date. For now it is all about you. You have got some homework to do for this week base on the Gospel of St. John. Read and study the Gospel of St. John for the month of December 2011.

(Please send me an email message, tweet me, or write a comment. Please let me know how this first assignment has helped you.)

The end of the Year 2011 will soon end and another new year begins. However, what have you learned from your 2011 good and bad experiences thus far?

How did you grow?

What areas spiritually, mentally, emotionally, and physically have you grown – became stronger?

Remember this is about you and your Relationship with our Heavenly Father and our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ.

Some of you have missed your blessings holding on to unforgiveness, bitterness, and other ugly painful buried emotions caused by others or from self.

Your experiences are to teach you. It does not matter who started or shared in the experience. Your experiences teach you to trust God. Remember Faith is God and God’s word. The two goes hand in hand. You must know God’s word. It is your lifeline. You must eat the word of God like you drink water each day. Increase in God and you will increase in Faith. You will stop worrying so much. You will begin to have a peace of mind.  The stress of paying bills, relationships, and other things etc will not trouble you as it once did. You will become discipline in the areas of your life that got you into a bunch of mess and trouble. If you are a complainer then you will stop complaining, you will stop getting on everyone’s nerves.

If you are one who has a bunch of material things and wealth then you will begin to appreciate the simple things in life that does not cost anything.  It will be those simple things that are the true blessings that will bring you peace.

And for those of you who treat God like a religion – Stop it!

Stop treating God and our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ like a religion. God and our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ are not a religion – God just is – Jesus just is – one of the same – Period!

Many have said that “it is good to know God, but one must be realistic.” Ugh! What is that? How can one have faith when one thinks like that? God is realistic! Our Lord and Savior is realistic. Those of you who do not believe in a God or that Jesus Christ died on the Cross to reconcile us back to God to redeem us by His Blood – okay. However, one “will confess that Jesus Christ is Lord.” How do I know because God’s word said so. I would rather believe and not go to hell then to not believe and go to hell. What harm can it do to not believe?

Many of you have blocked your physical and mental healings because of your behaviors in pride, selfishness, greediness, and how you may have mistreated others aware and unaware.

Many of you are wealthy and you have not given to help those who have less than you or in a greater need. I am not talking about giving donations to already funded organizations. I am talking about given to organizations (like mines) who do not have funding that are in the trenches each day changing lives for a better world. These individuals and organizations you never hear about, but they are the ones who are faithful because they do it without having money.

I am talking about when you are walking down the street and you literally see someone eating out of a garbage can. What harm would it do to buy a meal for that person? What harm would it do to buy that person shoes, coat, or clothing? Do not give money – just meet the need.

Gosh! God will bring so much healing into your life. God will not just bring physical healing but other healings too. God will do a work in you and through you that you could never imagine, if you are sincere.

What harm would it do for you to OPEN A DOOR for someone else to succeed especially when others have open doors for you to succeed?

Some of you are just plain mean, evil, and selfish. Do you actually aspect for God to heal you when you are being so ugly? Come on now and let us be real. If you think that then you do not know God. Do not get angry with me because it is in the Gospel of St. John – look it up.

Be Warned. God loves a cheerful giver. Do not help others and boast about it to others or to make yourself think that you are a good person, or help others expecting for something in return. None of these behaviors will work with God. Help others because it is the right thing to do and do it to glorify God.

Praise God by saying and doing the following:

“Dear heavenly Father and my God, I am doing this to glorify you because I love you. I may not love you like I should, but please accept my giving as my love for you and for my neighbor. Lord, I thank you that you have blessed me to be a blessing. God I give you all the glory and all of the praise– Blessed be God.” 

Begin to praise God sincerely. Wait on God and when you are ready to receive it, God will keep his word to you. I promise you. God will bless you in the areas of your life that money and power just cannot buy.

Many times, most of us block our blessings because of how we treat strangers (first) our love ones (second), our co-workers, employees, or employers (third). In that order –Read St. John and allow what Jesus did to be the example of how you are to treat others.  As you read the Gospel of St. John, you will see how Jesus is passionate about how we treat strangers – our neighbors.  Your eyes will be open to notice that many of the blessings we will receive is base upon how we treat strangers.

Some of you may be saying “I love everyone.” Stop lying.

We are not God.  Therefore, we are incapable of loving everyone because many of us do not love our selves. We treat others base upon a condition and how we have been conditioned.  All of us may have hurt others by our words and actions, even if we may not have meant to; therefore, one cannot love everyone. We can only love unconditionally as we grow in God’s grace and mercy and appreciation of who God is in us.

The little things block our blessings and hurt us just as much as the big things that we do to each other. An example will be when one is driving and another driver is trying to get into the same lane and the driver in the same lane speeds up not allowing the driver to get into lane. Another example, while driving, is when a driver speedily dashes in and out causing an accident and or jumping into a lane without warning.

Another example is when a stranger speaks to someone and that person ignores the stranger. It is a blessing when a stranger speaks to you in sincere kindness.  No one has to recognize your existence but that stranger did.  One does not know who, how, or when God will bless you. The stranger may offer you the words you may need to hear, or the stranger you ignore may be the answer to your prayers. “Be careful how one treats strangers, for one may be entertaining an angel unaware.”

Yes indeed, it is the little ugly things that we do to others that can and will stop our blessings that ONLY God can do.

Now is time to grow for God’s glory!

You got to let go of deep hurts and buried horrible experiences that have hindered you from growing in every aspect of your life. We cannot expect for our Heavenly Father to heal us when we do not talk (pray) to Him and or when we are disobedient to his word. Remember that each good or bad experience is about you, and your growth. Each experience brings a challenge or a light into who you are and what you are to become. Ask God what are you trying to teach me through this experience – this trial or life’s test?

It does not matter if you are one years old or 109 years old. God is the Author and Finisher of YOU, and God did it because he made you his glory. God’s word is complete.  Because you are still growing (hopefully), you are not complete yet, so God must complete the work in you that he has completed. (I hope I did not confused you.)

God wrote the script for your life, but you must develop a relationship with him with sincerity. It is all up to you.

If you are sincerely a “Son or Daughter of God” then you have to walk the walk and talk the talk. I do not mean being religious either. That is just a job. I do not mean going around putting other folks down thinking you are all of that! It is ONLY by God’s grace and mercy that you have not fallen into certain sins. It is God’s keeping power that kept you even in the midst of your mess.

Please do the following below to start the healing and growing process, so you can stop blocking your blessings; it would help you to write them down in a journal:

Step #1:

Dig deep within yourself and ask God to reveal the hidden places within you –the places that you have buried unforgiveness, hatred, hurt, and shame etc.

Step#2:

I want you to repent for having any unforgiveness for yourself and for others.

Unclog yourself. Think of unforgiveness as a huge block of grease, food, and hair that has block your drain and no water can flow out.

Unforgiveness is someone who is in Spiritual Intensive Care on life support!

Step#3:

I want you to think about your good and bad experiences, and ask yourself how those experiences have molded your behaviors. Make two lists. One is for bad experiences and one is for good experiences. For each bad experience, please write down how the experience has strengthened you even if you feel that you have not gain strength– you have.

Just think and write the strengths that you have gain from the bad experiences. Do not focus on the bad experience but focus on what good came out of the bad experience. Focus on how that bad experience made you to fight or force you to step out of your comfort zone. The bad experience may have opened your eyes or your heart to God. Something good did come out of your bad experience. If nothing us, you made it through it. Praise God!

Write down if the bad experience made you to be unforgiving, mean, evil, hurtful to others, vengeful etc., – these are your weaknesses. One will die spiritually first, mentally and then physically (“kill, steal, and destroy”)

Do the same for your good experiences. What have you learned? What areas did you grow?

One can have knowledge and still not grow. One must applied what one has learned in order to grow.

Step#4:

I want you to ask yourself how those experiences have made you to be a better person – a more appreciative, caring and compassionate person then write them down.

Step#5:

Ask yourself have you shared your experiences good or bad to help others on your life journey.

This complete your first homework assignment. Many are to follow as you respond.

Face your behavior – your sins. It is about you and your personal relationship with your God – Your Lord and Savior.

It is not over for you until God says so!

Your sins will be forgiven if you would just repent (undergo a complete change of heart).

The lessons you learn from the sins you have committed will be the beginning of a new chapter in your life.

We are God’s glory!

IT IS ALL GOOD!

We are to learn from our sin experiences.

In my life’s journey with sin, I have learned:

To love God more and grow closer to Him

To be humble

To have greater faith

To worship and praise Him more sincerely

To become disciplined in every aspect of my life

To live without the stress of what others expect of me

To love myself

To accept the anointing on my life as part of God’s grace

To understand God will not forsake me, even when I sin

To develop a true relationship with God, Jesus and the Holy Spirit

I am set free from Christian doctrines while I allow the Holy Spirit to do its job in me for God’s glory.

I am an Over-Comer!

You will begin to see how you are an Over-Comer too!

I want to thank each of you for expressing your opinions.  I praise God that over 585 of you have commented on the articles and 98% have been positive comments.  The positive comments encourage me to keep going.

I told God this year that “I do not want You to look at me and be sad for creating me.  I want You to smile and boast proudly “that I am your Daughter – your creation – made for your glory.” I want God to be proud of me as with any child who loves their parents.

I had made a choice to take care of my sick and disabled love ones for the past 12 years since the sudden death of my mother, Sylvia Izora Bogan, “Pat.” She was 57 years old whom died of cardiac failure. I am an unemployed 24/7 caregiver and my loves one reside with me. I know how it feels to cry and wonder if God will heal your sick love one who laid in ICU while knowing that your love one would not be suffering if it was not for someone else’s ignorance or pride. There were times, I could not pray, so I called the Righteous, “for the prayers of the Righteous avails much.”

I know about not having health care. I know what it is like to not have the monies to pay rent, electricity, gas, phone etc. I know what it is like to lose your home.  I know what it is like to be “homeless.”  We have had people who have stolen are precious memories to sell. We have had people to mistreat or take advantage of us. I know how it feels to be violated.  I know how it feels to want to give up on life.  I know how it feels to love others and they have walked away as if one never existed.  Furthermore, I am persecuted more than you would know. Folks have lied on me too. Oh Yes, I have experience many of the trials and tribulations that each one of you may have gone through too.

So when I write, I write based upon my experiences and what the Holy Spirit taught me. It is not wrong or right.  It is my experience that only I can attest.  Even the sins that I have committed have taught me and made me grow closer to God.  My sins taught me about God’s grace and God’s mercy.  I am not all of that, but I am all of that through God. This is why my book is named “God, I Want to Sin.” Each of my sins drew me closer to God.  My sins taught me how to become discipline, for I did not want to endure the negative consequences for those sins again.

Despite it all, I continued to press toward the mark of the high calling. There have been many times that I had given up on the ministry because of the lack of funds and hundreds of youth who need help.  It has been discouraging.  However, the Holy Spirit would convict me, so I have continued to minister to at-risk, high-risk youth, and their families without funding or contributions.

We meet at my home, and my youth are packed into one small bedroom. I cannot afford to rent a center or space.  None of the “centers” are open at late hours when youth tend to get into trouble or are killed. I prepare a healthy meal for them each week while we have our weekly bible-rap session. Many of my youth never receive a healthy meal.  Most will eat junk food forever. Always lacking, I make sacrifices to help others too. I do without to help others, for I see their needs being greater than mines. However, I do put my trust in God to always meet the need. It is my love for our Heavenly Father and our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ that I do it. I am commissioned to love, and so are you.

Those of you who have voice negative comments; I welcome them too, for your comments helps me to go back to God.  When people voice their negative comments, I do not get offended as I once did.  I have learned that it was not for him or her to understand the message, for he or she is not ready to receive the message given, or it is not meant for him or her.  It is okay.

One can voice their opinions without being ugly or offensive. Those opinions, I would ask for people to keep to themselves because those offensive opinions only plants a seed of negativity into their own lives that he or she will reap the harvest (greater than).

In addition, offensive comments display one’s spiritual growth.  When one has spiritually grown, he or she will not be offensive to others. He or she will have the wisdom to speak life (words) and not death into the lives of others.  Just because a message does not make sense to you, it does not mean that it is wrong. For those of you who make mockery of what has been written, the same speaks to you too.

Proverbs 18:21 says that “Life and Death is in the power of the tongue, and one will eat its fruit.”

It is my prayer that each one of you will become encourage. It is my prayer that a seed is planted into your life to help you to grow and seek a closer walk with our Heavenly Father and our Lord and Savior Jesus. Most of all, I pray for each one of you and that you will have peace of mind in the midst of the storms of life and good health. These are the blessings that money just cannot buy.

Again, I welcome your good and bad comments.

Always feel free to email me at lybogan@netzero.com.

Be Encourage as Always

Ms. Lorraine

 I thank those of you whom have email me for prayer request.  I have responded to each one as well as continue prayer.

I am back!

I have restarted the youth outreach Bible ministry in Chicago Heights, Illinois whereby I reside. The ministry has been growing.  To my surprise, more male youth have been attending recently.  I do not know if it is due to the few teenage females in the group. Because my organization – OverComers-SAFE Haven Ministries has no funding, and I take care of my very sick quadriplegic father and disabled twin brother. I have the sessions at our home. 

Now, the program is growing so fast that I have been praying for donations, so I can pay to rent a  building space in the community. I want to go forward with other outreach programs for our at-risk and high-risk youth. I have been dormant since 2001, so it is time for me to do what God has chosen and anointed me to do.

Yes. I could partner with other organizations in the community. I choose not to partner with other organizations in the community from experience.  I had learned that it was more about the organization’s politics and protocols than the people that these heavily funding organizations are to serve.  Therefore, I just do not do it.  I only care about doing God’s work – that’s it.  Funding is very competitive and very political. It is always about whom you know. Besides, I love it when God does His thing through faith!  This is when I know that God is in control, so it is all good – harder – but all good.

As far as the weekly youth outreach bible sessions, I think that I had been a little too harsh in my teaching of obedience to God.  My reason was for the youth to become more obedient and to honor their parents. 

I am teaching them to control their tongues.  I am teaching them discipline.  I am teaching them not to let folks stressed them out.  I am teaching them how to view things from their parents without being rebellious. I am teaching them that they will always have someone whom may have authority over them, so they must learn how to respect authority. I teach them to respect property and their neighbors too, so I teach, and I teach.  I teach using the Word of God – The Holy Bible.

I do not want these youth “playing church” like most adults in the church.  I want them to take their Salvation seriously. I do not want them to become religious.  I want them to appreciate their new relationship with our God, Lord, and Savior. I teach them that once they accept Salvation that they are in a covenant relationship with God, Our Lord, and Savior.

 Many of the youth are afraid of receiving Salvation because they want to be “right.”  Most youth are committing fornication, swearing, and doing other ugly-youth-behavior things common at their age. However, they are at the age of discovering their purpose for living too.  Therefore, this is the time – cross roads – to provide to them Christian morals, understanding, respect, values, and nurturing.  This is the time to “plant” or “water.”

 In our youth discussions, I am amazed to how most have been “condition” in their spiritual (not religious) beliefs.  Even more, it amazes me of the churches they have visited, and their perception of Biblical teachings.

These churches have left many of them more confused about Salvation and God. Most think there is a God, but they are not certain.  I can understand it from a human standard especially with so many different Christian doctrines being taught.

Do you know that many would rather continue in their “fun” behaviors than to receive Salvation at their current state of behaviors?  Gosh!  I am praying on this one.  I have to be honest with them, for I am held accountable for each soul – each life, so I take teaching the Word of God seriously.  I pray for each youth and person that I have meet. Those of you who write for prayer, I respond.  I am here for you.

With my youth last week, we had some heated discussions about teen homosexuals, teen suicide, the 144,000, obedience, forgiveness, and Salvation. I took them to the Word of God. In fact, I teach them to “ask” and “hear” God for themselves.   

For the next several weeks, I will explain each of these topics as well as discuss them on the online radio show beginning November 5, 2011 at 10:00 p.m.

I will be teaching on suicide, for I have survived suicide twice and I am a Christian.  I understand the human struggle. Two of the youth in the group were struggling with suicide thoughts.  I praise God that they no longer struggle with these thoughts. 

However, many believe that God will not forgive those who commit suicide because of what their parents, churches, and others have taught them.  This is not true, so I will have prayer for those who are struggling with thoughts of suicide, and I will provide counseling too on BlogTalk Radio on November 5, 2011 at 10:00 p.m. 

Stay tune

Love Ya!

The Ocean

Suddenly, I awaken to find myself floating in a mass of water. Paralyzed with fear, I tilt my head to the left and saw water. I tilt my head to the right and saw water. I look straight up and saw the sky. Questions speeds through my thoughts trying to understand how I got to this place. Why am I here in the ocean?

There is no floating device to keep me from drowning. I am wondering what is sustaining me – keeping me in this mass of water…

As I float, thoughts of my family, friends and even my enemies filled my eyes with tears. I feel that my demised is near. How would I connect with them once more? Do they know that I am gone? Do they miss me? I began to reflect on relationships and forgiveness. I began to search my heart for anything I have done wrong and did not correct when I had the opportunity.

I repented.

Repented for anything and everything I have done or did not do that I was supposed to do. I do not want anything to keep me from seeing the Glory of God. I want to make certain that I was going home to Jesus, so I have to make certain that I have forgiven those who have hurt me. I know that if I do not forgive, I was not going home to be with my God, Lord, and Savior. I knew that unforgiveness was the absolute sin. I knew God would not forgive me if I did not forgive. I knew that my final judgment and sentence would be eternal damnation – to hell.

I do not want to go there – to hell.

I am afraid to move among in this ocean, so I lay as still as I could. I do not see or feel any sharks, fish, or anything touching me. I could not see or feel anything that could destroy me. All I can see and feel is this ocean and the rays of light streaming from the sky unto my face.

I do not know what is keeping me afloat. I am just glad I am floating and not drowning in this ocean.

I do not know what to do nor do I know how I am going to survive right now. I call out to God. “Please have mercy on me!” “God, please hear my cry and save me!” Fear strikes me, so I must do something. God is not saying anything. I cannot hear His voice. I cry once more. “God, please speak to me and tell me what to do.” God, please show me what to do. God, I cannot stand still in this ocean for long. I am afraid that I will drown, for I do not know what is keeping me afloat. I cannot just float in this mass ocean of water and do nothing. I have to somehow make it or die trying. I have to fight. I have to survive. I do not know what to fight nor do I know how I am going to survive. I have never experience this before. I just know that I have to make a move. I have to do something, so I position my body to swim.

Nervously, I kick my legs. I turn my head and body in a complete circle to see anything or anyone that could help me – save me. I do not see a boat or a ship, so I look up to the sky, and I do not see a plane. I began to swim. I do not know what direction I am to swim, but I must swim to a destiny – to a place of refuge. As I swim, I need to stop and float to catch my breath. Still, there is no boat or ship in sight, so I look up to the sky hoping to see a plane. I see nothing in this ocean.

Aghhh! “God forgive me!” I yelled.

My heart stricken with sorrow, for I began to realized how selfish I must have been when I asked for forgiveness, here and right now, in this ocean. I wonder if I would have asked for forgiveness when I did not find myself in this ocean. I kept wondering why my salvation is so important to me now. I find myself floating and swimming in a direction that I do not know where. All I can think about is my salvation. Wondering and hoping that I did everything right when I had the opportunity.
Hoping that I was sincere for only God knows my heart. I do not know my heart. I just did what I was taught as my experiences condition me to be. I have to stop swimming now because my tears of sorrow are flooding my eyes. Now, I realized that, at first, I did not seek my first love. I did not seek my God – my Heavenly Father when I awoke and found myself in this ocean. I took my God for granted. I took my salvation for granted. Was I grateful for all God has done for me?

“God forgive me for I did not call-out to you first. I did not seek you first. I did not pray to you first. All I did was ask for your forgiveness, but it was for selfish motives. I am not certain that it is from my heart that I repented. I just wanted to make certain that I would not go to hell, so I said all the words that I was taught to say. Please God have mercy on me and forgive me.”

“Heavenly Father, I am afraid!” God, why am I in this ocean and how did I get here? Why am I here? God, please send someone to help me. God, please send a plane, a ship, or a boat. God, please send me help. God, I need your help right now! Please God speak to me. Speak to me right now! Oh Dear God, please give me the strength to swim until you send help. Please Dear God; please protect me in this ocean. Please God keep me from drowning. God please keep me according to your grace and mercy!”

All of a sudden, I wake up as sweat and tears drench me. It was all a dream. “Whew! This dream seems so real. Have mercy on me! I do not want to go through that.” I lay back down in my bed, but I could not go back to sleep. I knew God wanted to speak to me. I got out of my bed and I kneel to the floor to pray. As I prayed, I heard the voice of the Lord speak to me.

“The Voice said unto me that I found myself in this ocean, but it was not an ocean of water to why I lay afloat, but the ocean represented God’s mercy.”

“The Voice said unto me that I found myself to looked up to the sky to feel the light rays upon me, but it was not the rays of light from the sky that was upon me, but the sky represented God’s grace.”

“The Voice said unto me that I did not have a floating device for all that I needed was God’s keeping power.”

“The Voice said unto me that I woke up out of my fear because I realized my sins and why I should never take my salvation for granted.”

Then I heard the Voice no more.

I understand now that no matter what I do, the keeping power of God’s Grace and Mercy surrounds me always.